It's probably the change of venue, but this year, more than ever, Christmas seems less important. Maybe I've lost some faith, but it seems like there is more to it than that.
Looking back, I suppose the holiday has gradually lost it's intrigue. But Christmas is supposed to be that time of year when we all feel like children.
Problem #1: I always feel like a child.
I'm sure come Christmas Day, I'll be in the spirit along with everyone else. But if I were not headed home for Christmas (not entirely of my own interest), I can conceive a perfectly content day/night of solitude. Maybe I'd watch Christmas movies and weep alone. But to me, that's pretty fulfilling, at this point in my life (wherever that might be).
Nothing feels like home anymore. Maybe that is the problem. Yet, the only thing that tells me that it's a problem is society. I am fine the being alone on Christmas. I have been alone at many points in my life, we all have. So, what's Christmas, but another day?
Well, it's Christmas!, you might say. But, in my perfect world, everyday would be like Christmas; no hate, all love.
We pretend everything is okay on Christmas, though it never is. I'm not saying we should pretend everything is okay all the time, nothing would get solved. I am saying, if we demonstrated the compassion we had for each other and for life in general (like we do on Christmas) every day of our lives, life would be a lot better for all of us.
So, don't tell me "please come home for Christmas."
I don't need that. I need that kind of compassion on a regular basis. I need a friend when I need a friend; I can not help my needs. I feel bad for the rest of you.